unraveling
one day while lying in a fetal position on my bathroom floor
when it all became too much
- my unraveling -
i began to wonder:
what do you physically do in your moments of unraveling?
when it all became too much
- my unraveling -
i began to wonder:
what do you physically do in your moments of unraveling?
This ongoing series of photographs taken on medium format film investigate the paradoxes and bittersweetness that exists within motherhood. Through portraiture, moments that are simultaneously layered with pain, loss of self, and unconditional love are honored as subjects are asked to share the other side of their story that often goes untold and remains unseen. Anxiety, vulnerability, bliss, mom guilt, and grief are common threads among the women in this series. Time is spent within each subject's personal spaces and homes, where I am able to document and honor what they physically do with their body in her moments of unraveling and acts of them 'carrying on'.
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in their moments of unraveling:
gritting teeth
hair pulling
eye rubbing
scratching
curling up
dazing and gazing
numbing
pretending.
dad
After having babies, I felt betrayed by my body.
I don't know how to let go.
The career I always wanted is what wears me down the most.
I'm always so tired, but I cannot sleep.
I help everyone else, but me.
I don't know how to let go.
The career I always wanted is what wears me down the most.
I'm always so tired, but I cannot sleep.
I help everyone else, but me.
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Wearing a heart monitor at the age of 34, it's only stress
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Face mask & anti-depressants, 2020
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Medium Fortmat Film/120, 2020
“There was a time not long ago that anxiety ruled both my mind and body. Illness coursed through me and took reign over my life. I was forced to put my dream of motherhood on hold to recover and be immersed in self discovery and love. It was as if once I found myself again, the baby found me, too. Pregnancy has only further calmed my anxious mind and presented countless new reasons to love and care for myself. I have my moments of worry, and sad days, but more notably I have an inner peace as my life unfolds in the way I had for so long wished it would.”
- Andrea Jensen